Posts
So let's give blogger another go-around. Maybe i will keep up with posting, if i have some reassurance that somebody - anybody, will read and be blessed.
In short, since coming back home from Guyana, i have been keeping busy with family duties, seeing friends, getting back involved in my church, taking summer classes, assisting and shadowing an ENT doctor, and most recently, going canvassing.
This summer i took the plunge, and decided that if i could go door-to-door in a group, what would stop me from going alone? After all, i am not completely alone. The attitude definitely has to be there, to not allow anything to get you discouraged; but you take the shield of faith, the helmet of salvation, and have your feet shod with the gospel of peace, and you're set! The Lord has been truly blessing my humble efforts.
You see, i have been learning that the missionary field does not exist solely overseas...it still is wanting in my very own "backyard."
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
Monday, February 23, 2009
Guyana 2009
January 8 -- JFK - New York
12:20 a.m.
“And call upon me in the day of trouble: I will deliver thee, and thou shalt glorify me.” Psalm 50:15. This is the verse God shared with me this morning. And boy, have I been needing it today! If ever there was a “day of trouble” it has occurred in the past 12 hours for me.
Right now I am waiting to board my flight to Guyana. And it’s a very comforting thought to know I am almost on that plane. So many times today I thought it would impossible to make it. And yet, by God’s grace, I am here, weary and tired, but here, nevertheless.
So when I got to the check-in place this afternoon, the lady at the counter simply just did not want to let me through! She was asking for a visa, then documents proving what I’m doing in Guyana, then a returning flight ticket, then for enough money on my debit card that I could buy a ticket when down there….all of which I had none. It was a whole ordeal, that I’d rather put behind me and not go through all the details, but it was so frustrating, I have to say. My flight was to be leaving at 4:20 and by the time she was satisfied enough to let me go, she said I would miss the flight anyway, but rushed me to customs. I went through, got on the shuttle in a frenzy, and looked at my watch: 4:10. There’s no way.
Ran to the gate. Flight’s delayed. Wow. So that was a whole adventure. But it didn’t end there. Not to go into more details, as soon as I got off the plane here in New York, the adventure continued. This time I found another fellow “partner in crime” hehe - a sweet, but desperate young Afghani girl. We found ourselves in the same situation, looking for our carry-on suitcases that the airline had taken and that we were supposed to pick up but had missed the place and weren’t allowed back in. We ran all over the airport, inside, outside, asking 3 dozen people, with each indication making us eventually go in circles, through elevators and terminals, and airtrains, and, whew, after running around together for about two hours we felt a bond that two people can only have when going through such an ordeal. Through a complete miracle, I spotted a lady carrying our bags for second and shouted for her to stop. We collected our bags and tried to recollect ourselves and complete the next mission.
We had to next find our gates. Sound easy? Ha! Not at JFK, 10:30 pm, when everything is closed and everyone’s too tired to care or help you out. The girl pleaded with me to help her, since it was her first time flying alone, and she was “so scared” she told me. So of course, we stuck together. After a lot more running around, we found her gate, but it was too late. She had lost her flight to Dubai. And I had to go and try to make it to mine in time! So after lending her my cellphone so she could call her mom, we exchanged, hugs, kisses, emails and everything and with a broken heart to have to leave her there, I ran for the airtrain.
And here I am. I think I should go check the mirror to see how many grey hairs have appeared since this morning. Oh boy, we’re boarding now! I wonder what craziness will await me next. Lord, help me.
9:15 am
Praise the Lord, I arrived at the mission house, safe and sound, with all my baggage, which is a complete miracle. On the flight, another surprise awaited me, but this time a good one! I recognized Taylor, the girl I had met before, and her family that head up the mission academy here in Guyana - and they had missed their flight and now we were on the same one! So praise the Lord, I didn’t have to get a taxi by myself….whew! God always does know what He’s doing, doesn’t He??
It’s good to be back...even though it’s rainy, but I’m definitely enjoying being back in the warm tropical weather. I look forward to the next several weeks and am expecting more great things to happen. Like Psalms says...from all these troubles, may God be glorified!
January 11 -- Bethany
8:20 pm
It’s a full moon tonight. I can clearly see the clouds in the dark sky, and the sand on campus seems to be alive under the moon’s reflection. All is peace and quiet, except for the occasional laughter and yelling from the girls’ side.
It’s good to be back in the peaceful jungles, away from everything familiar. It’s good, though it’s not my favorite, nor my first choice. I returned here I guess more out of duty than desire, and I don’t think I should feel guilty saying that, because really, the carnal, natural self does not instinctively, knowingly choose the path that is full of self-denial, sacrifice, and the one of toil and out-of-your-comfort-zone day by day experiences. Not at all.
At the same time, I need to count my blessings, though it’s sometimes hard to look past the fact that I’m back to eating white rice, living with one hour of electricity a day, bat poop on my floor, and humidity that sprouts mold on almost everything. Yesterday I took out the box of clothes I had left here and found to my dismay all my things moldy and stained from cockroach excrement - after only three weeks! But what can you do, just get out the tub and start scrubbing as hard as you can!
But the blessings are there, and I don’t mean to sound like a half-empty glasser; I just want to share the reality of mission work. So anyway, there is truly not many greater things than to have your students scream and pounce on you when you show up after the break, and hear them telling of their experiences of when they went back home and the impact they’ve had on their families or in the villages they went to work in and to know that somehow, someway, you’re making a difference directly and indirectly in people’s lives.
There’s nothing much better than being out of the rat-race life, a hectic cycle that has you going going going and at the end of the day you look back and can’t figure out what all you have accomplished in that day. When you’re out here, though, at least you know you fed two dozen people, and may have taught someone something new, and helped a fellow neighbor feel better with their health. It’s worth it, right?
I have to write these things you see, sometimes more for myself, to keep me focused, because honestly I already miss home very much. I wish God could just *whoosh*, erase all memory of my dear ones back home, of the comforts and life I left behind, but it doesn’t work that way. But what He does do is give me the promises I need just to make it through another day - and not just make it, but have joy and fulfillment while I’m going through it, moment by moment. And that alone makes me happy. I guess this is a small example of living a life of faith - a life where your happiness doesn’t come by feelings, but it’s based on a more sure foundation - the Rock of Ages. Praise be to God!
January 16
7:30 pm
What a week it has been! Full of surprises, laughs, and blessings. The greatest blessing for me this week has been knowing that God isn’t done with me yet. He hasn’t given up on me! Even though, let me tell you, wow, I see so much in myself that needs to change: attitudes, desires, thoughts, ugly feelings...and being in the mission field brings out every little poor character trait - that you thought you’d never had to deal with!
I just read over the last entry and became so disappointed in myself for writing such things down, I wanted to erase it all. Really, how can I complain of white rice when I know there’s people out there don’t have food to fill their bellies, or little electricity, when we have so many conveniences, like running water, flushing toilets and showers?
I have been really ungrateful; taking so much for granted, even the awesome opportunities of sharing God’s love with other people who don’t know it. In many countries now the religious liberties are narrowing rapidly and Christians are being slaughtered just for being Christians. And wow, I dare to complain, even if just only in my mind, of having to walk through rain and mud for almost four hours to do one Bible study, or missing a meal or sleep because of evening prayer meetings in the village...God had to severely rebuke me through this evening’s worship on the rebellion of Korah and what a real evil murmuring and complaining is.
On a lighter note, outreach yesterday was really great - going back to Mashabo - it’s been almost a month since I saw my dear friends! This time it was Liz and Kimberly that accompanied me on the treck to the village. We had a nice time visiting, praying with people, seeing my Papi Kenneth again, and doing a Bible study with eager Fazel and his wife, Sharifa. I love studying with them, since he always is full of questions and ready and eager to study the Bible, even if we’re interrupting him from his work or other projects. And I especially love to see the students giving the studies - this was Kimberly’s first one, and it’s always amazing to me how God’s Word alone is so powerful, that anyone, experienced or inexperienced, old or young, bright or dull, can share His truth and through the Holy Spirit have a lasting impact on many souls.
So after we got done visiting and studying with our lovely young friends, and realizing that time had just flown by, we quickly started back for home. The only problem was that we had to get across the Mashabo river. And when we got to the shore, there was no boat and no one home in the nearby houses that could get us across. We had no choice but to wait there, soaking up the hot mid-day sun.
What do you know, though, that soon enough we spotted two little figures out in the middle of the river slowly coming our way. I didn’t get my hopes up very high, because I realized that their little canoe, was indeed a little canoe! These small, dug-out boats are no wider than two feet and about nine feet long - just perfect for little boys and girls that paddle to go to school every day. Well, nevertheless, it was something, and at least one of the boys had a paddle, so there was a glimmer of hope.
I asked the boy with the paddle if we could possible get a ride to the other shore, and, though he was shy and didn’t say anything audibly, I understood from him that we could get in. So we did. Kind of.
Kimberly went in first and made it look like a really easy thing to do - just climb into the canoe, right?! Well, then I tried to get in and sit down but could not keep the thing steady! As I was trying desperately to keep balanced, Liz attempted at sitting down, and just then as we were rocking back and forth, before I knew it, I was out of the canoe and in the water - right there in the shallows by the shore! I was the only one also, that managed to get my whole backside soaked, but oh well, we laughed and tried to think of a different plan.
Kimmy soon had the idea of splitting up - she would go with the other little boy who had just gotten in another small canoe and started paddling toward us - not with a paddle, but just with his hands - it was quite a sight! So she got on with boy #2, and they were soon on their way. Liz I were now trying to follow in their trail, but first had to get all the water out of the now almost-sunken canoe, so Liz now is bailing out the water with a bottle and we try again. Another failed attempt, another quick bath.
As she’s once again back to her bailing job, and I’m wringing out the water from my skirt, all of a sudden I hear this screaming! I look up and there is poor Kimmy - in the water! She’s there in the middle of the river, holding up her purse above the water and laughing and screaming! The canoe is no where to be seen and the little boy’s head is bopping up and down as they’re both now trying to swim back to shore. The whole thing was just so funny, I couldn’t help but laugh for like ten minutes at the sight and knowing that that would’ve been us if we had gotten any farther out from the shore. Wow. I hadn’t laughed so hard in a long time. It was great.
Kimmy made it back to shore safely after being rescued by a boat that just happened to be going by with some worker guys who gave us some strange looks and smiles as they delivered our friend back to dry land but we all had a good laugh and soon we were on the other shore after they kindly offered to give us a ride.
The moral of the story? Little wobbly canoes are not meant for big people. Learned that one pretty quick. The real lesson that’s harder to grasp sometimes is that many times we’re just meant to wait. There’s nothing reasonable for us do, even if it may seem reasonable to us at the moment, but we try to do something anyway, because we’re just too impatient. The answer is right on its way, but sometimes it finds us when we’ve already sunk and gotten ourselves in a muddy mess when all this time we could’ve been patiently waiting on God and trusting that He would take us to the other side instead of trying to go on our own - even setting out without a paddle! Boy, are we headstrong at times. And yes, God in His mercy reminds us - even if has to make us cry - or laugh!
January 28
4:45 pm
“When trials arise that seem unexplainable, we should not allow our peace to be spoiled. However unjustly we may be treated, let not passion arise…If we surrender our lives to His service, we can never be placed in a position for which God has not made provision. Whatever may be our situation, we have a Guide to direct our way; whatever our perplexities, we have a sure Counselor; whatever our sorrow, bereavement, or loneliness, we have a sympathizing Friend.” (COL 172)
This has been my experience - and it makes me so happy!
Many things have been happening the past two weeks, things that put me in the “grind”, and looking back, I know that it was only through the power of God that I can, and do, keep going. So I praise His name I am still alive and well, in high spirits and resting in Him. What a joy it is to serve our Almighty, Loving God!
My days have been filled with doing treatments on Andre, teaching and preparing for class, helping out with Wednesday night small evangelistic meetings up the Essequibo River, giving Bible studies in Mashabo, cooking, gardening, and washing. Life - though it’s got its challenges, it is very fulfilling here.
I am settled - though I have gotten to use the internet just once in the three weeks I’ve been here now, I don’t miss it. Haven’t used a phone or gotten in a car since I left, either, and yet I am happy. I am learning so much here that I know I could not learn anywhere else. Being put in situations that I have never faced before, and my only option is to move forward confidently, has greatly increased my faith and dependance on the wisdom, strength and patience from above. Though I face great tasks, humongous obstacles and intense inner and outward struggles every day, the Lord is telling me, “Say not, ‘I am only a child’”.
So all I am left to do is to advance, not looking behind, but going forward overcoming - overcoming indeed, by the blood of Jesus that washes away my sins (Rev. 12 and Rev. 1:5) and through the “word of my testimony” - my own personal experience with the Lord, constantly moment by moment abiding in Him.
The Lord can not save us from trial, but He can save us from defeat!
February 8
1:00 pm
I love the Lord, because he hath heard my voice and my supplications. Because He hath inclined His ear unto me, therefore will I call upon Him as long as I live.
-Psalm 116:1,2
As I was sitting by the dock at Cobis Landing, looking at my watch for the tenth time, I was trying to reassure myself that I had not made a hasty decision in trying to go out to Georgetown that day. The truth is that Catie and I did leave campus much later than we had hoped for, we had no boat to take us across, and, after reaching Cobis found out that it was shopping day for the people in the village so all the boats had gone out. What were the chances we were going to find a boat to take us to Supenaam? Slim.
So what could we do, other than take off our loaded backpacks, sit down in the shade, and pray that God would send a boat our way. We reminded God (and ourselves) that the trip we were venturing on was for His glory. We had a long list of books, clothes, and supplies we needed to get for the people in Mashabo.
Last Thursday as our group was just leaving Mashabo, dear Auntie Orlinda pulled me aside. “Look,” she said as she pointed to the gaping holes in her shirt, “I am ashamed to wear this, but you know how my husband died a few years back and my sister has her own family to support so this Christmas I received nothing from anybody. Please give me a nice dress suit to wear to church.” I promised her I would do my best and with a heavy heart, I left, more determined that somehow I HAD to go to Georgetown and get Auntie some clothes and the hymnals and other Bible books I had promised the people.
I had decided to leave on Tuesday, but when Monday rolled around and I was done with my class in the morning, I thought, why not leave now? So I asked Catie to join me and after lunch we set off and walked the couple miles to the dock at Cobis. Now, we had to wait. We waited and waited some more. By this time it was 3:00, school let out and the kids were coming towards the dock to get to their canoes and paddle home. I decided to take some pictures of the unique Guyanese “schoolboats” and the children all dressed nicely in their uniforms paddling down the river, when the headmaster came up to me to send a message to Ms. Melissa. I then asked him if he was going by Supenaam and could give us a ride. “Sure,” he said, “just now!” Catie and I looked at each other, with “Praise GOD!” written all over our faces. We got into his boat and as we took off, we bowed our heads and thanked the Lord for answering our prayer and sending us the boat “just in time” - God’s perfect timing.
What joy fills my heart after these little experiences when I see how faithful God is to me in the way He always provides. Yesterday is another example of Isaiah’s inspired words in Isaiah 65:24: And it shall come to pass, that before they call, I will answer; and while they are yet speaking, I will hear.
This past week we had decided that after church on Sabbath, we want to spend more time with the people in Mashabo, visiting and fellow-shipping together because the time we spend on Thursdays never seems to be enough. So we had talked to Fazil and Sharifa and the plan was set - to have lunch at their house after church so we could spend more time in the village instead of hurrying off back to campus half-starved after church.
I was looking forward to this Sabbath all week - I always love spending Sabbaths in Mashabo, with “our little flock” but I knew that this one was indeed going to be special. After another wonderful church service, and greeting the people, Elder Levi and his wife Pearl hand us a bag of food. We hadn’t expected that, since this was the first time anyone’s ever given us food just like that, but we took it gratefully and soon we were over the river and arriving at Fazil’s house - all seven of us, Fazil, his wife and two kids. As we settled in and took out the bowl of rice and chow mein Aunti Pearl had made, it got quiet as we if we were all expecting something to happen but it wasn’t happening. Well, we were expecting something - the food! The little bowl of rice and noodles didn’t seem hardly enough for all twelve of us! But never the less, we asked the Lord’s blessing and started serving ourselves, no one saying anything about the food, but in my mind I was thinking, “What’s going on? Where’s the food Sharifa was to prepare?” After everyone got a humble portion of the food on their plates and we were chatting, Fazil finally admitted, “You know, when you said you would be coming to our house to eat, we thought that YOU were bringing the food!” Oh no! We laughed at our little misunderstanding, but had to acknowledge and praise the Lord that once again He made up for the lack and sent us food - before we had even realized that we would need it!
Indeed, the food was just enough for all of us to be satisfied and quiet our hungry stomachs. However, Fazil was eating his rice quite slowly and thoughtully, and I noticed that he didn’t seem to have much appetite when he looked up suddenly and said,, “So when are we going to have another Bible study? I am more hungry for the Word of God!” I smiled as I thought how full of truth Christ’s words were when He said, “I am the bread of live: he that cometh to Me shall never hunger; and he that believeth on me shall never thirst. Though I was thankful for the physical food, I knew that in a few hours I was going to get hungry again, but there is nothing like feeding on the Word of God, that fills a hunger nothing else can. Soon we were feeding on more of the “Living Bread” as we dove into a Bible study with Fazil on Revelation. The time quickly passed, because before we knew it it was already 5:00 and we knew that if we didn’t leave soon we’d have to walk through the jungle in the dark to get back home. In the end, we did end up having to walk the last portion of the trail just by the scattered moonlight that would shine through the holes in the foliage above, but my heart was full from experiencing the bountiful love of God, that it had no more room for fear of any spooky creatures that may come out at night from the jungle around us, for “perfect love casteth out fear.” As we were walking back, each one of us deep in his own thoughts, Fazil’s words came to my mind - “You know, you all from Bethany did so much for me. I was a Muslim and I would read the Bible, but I could never understand it. Then you guys came and are answering all my questions. I am getting to know the real truth.”
If God sent me to Guyana just for one soul, it would be worth it. I am so happy.
February 12
4:00 pm
“All who consecrate soul, body, and spirit to God will be constantly receiving a new endowment of physical and mental power. The inexhaustible supplies of heaven are at their command...Through co-operation with Christ they are complete in Him, and in their human weakness they are enabled to do the deeds of Omnipotence.” -DA 827
Let me tell you about our deeds of omnipotence!
Today God sent four of us to Mashabo - to some specific people I’ve never even met before. We left early once again, at 6:30 a.m., eating our bananas and bread as we were walking in the rain - it was quite a sight! We’ve decided to take off early on Thursday mornings in order to get as much time with the people as possible, since we have to make it back in time for the students to go to their afternoon class at 2:30 in the afternoon.
After the usual one hour and 45 minutes, we reached our beloved little village, prayed and split up. Andre suggested that Kimberly and I should visit the little house by the headmaster’s place because we’ve never visited the man that lives there. I don’t know why, we’ve just always skipped that little house. Well today was going to be like no other day.
As we came up to the man, we introduced ourselves and asked if we could just visit with him and share some words of encouragement from God’s Word. He smiled and answered with an, “of course!” and as we sat down on his steps and opened our Bibles, he said, “wait a second” and went inside. He came back with a notebook and pencil and said he wants to take down notes! Wow, ok, so I looked at Kimmy and told her, let’s give this man a Bible study!
God led us to bring some encouragement to our dear new friend Gilbert through verses like Matthew 14, Revelation 21, and Acts 1 that speak about Jesus’ second coming and the future life with Him in heaven. As we shared, we found out from him that he’s been living alone for several years, all his children are out of the house, and he stopped going to church four years ago. His next words struck at my heart - “You know, to be honest with you, I’ve seen you guys from Bethany coming by here all the time and I have always been wondering when I’m going to get a visit. But I said, well, I guess it’ll be in the Lord’s timing; and today, you finally came!”
Lord, forgive us for neglecting a soul that has always been right under our noses. No wonder he stopped going to church, if the church members don’t reach out to people like Gilbert. I invited him out to come out on Sabbath and promised him a Bible, which made him very happy.
God next took us over the river, through some trails and straight to brother Isaac’s house - only brother Isaac wasn’t home - his wife was. I had been to his house once before, on a Sunday, when we were waiting for almost a whole afternoon for his wife to come back from church to get a treatment. We had carried towels with us and even a bag of ice, but she never showed up. Poor brother Isaac was so disappointed, and we left with half-sunken hearts, but hoping for another opportunity to see her.
Well, this time we did. And boy, did we find another neglected soul. Auntie Verna was working in her yard when we came up and offered to pray with her and see if we can help with anything. She willingly came and after I asked if there’s anything specific we could pray for, she spilled her great burden to us; “Yes,” she said, “please pray for my son-in-law. You see, just yesterday he was cursing me because I go to church.” She told us the whole story with tears in her eyes - how nobody was visiting her and she was sick and still had to work hard and then the Full Gospel church people came along some months ago and they visited her and prayed with her and how she felt better afterwords, so she started to go to their meetings and church services but now her son is angry and….well, what could we do other than to sit her down and open the Word of God to her!
And what a blessing that little meeting was, for afterwords, she looked like a burden had been lifted off her back. We read to her the blessings in Matthew 5, when Jesus tells us that we are blessed when we are persecuted for righteousness’ sake, and how we must bless those that curse us and pray for our enemies and do good to those that despitefully use us and say all manner of evil against us.
Oh how she was soaking up every word, for you see, Aunti Verna is losing her eyesight as well and cannot read so whenever someone can read to her the words from the Bible is like a fountain of water filling dry ground. And what joy fills my heart to know that another thirsty soul was able to drink some of the Living Water!
She then treated us to some very refreshing coconut water from her coconut tree and asked us if we could somehow help her little granddaughter suffering from some sort of infection in her leg. We took a look at the little six-year-old girl and Kimmy immediately recognized it as Filaria - a worm parasite that enters into your skin and causes fever and terrible rashes. We happened to have our medicine bag with us, so we made a charcoal poultice and applied it, giving her instructions on some other simple treatments Iona can do to help heal her daughter’s now swollen leg. Unfortunately, once the parasite enters the body, supposedly it never comes out, so all you can do is just keep the symptoms under control.
So yes, today was really a blessing. We also counseled our friend __ suffering from sever hypertension, to stop eating so much salt, white flour, sugar and fried foods. We gave her a back a foot massage and told her to drink plenty of water. We also saw and treated my little friend Renneatte, who had fever and diarrhea and another family we came across in a little hut that were all sick with the flu. There is so much need and so little time!
So God did another miracle for us. Since we visited so many people today, before we knew it, the time was 1:00 - way past the time we were supposed to leave - and we were on the other side of the river! We had to quickly say goodbye to our friends and take off for home. However, realizing that it would be humanly impossible to reach campus by 2:30, class time, our only hope was to grasp the hand of omnipotence. So we prayed that God would somehow give us the speed to make it back in time and not cause any problems with the teacher.
We bowed our heads as Andre prayed in faith that we would reach back by 2:15 - and you know what? - God never fails! Yes, we did our part - we did run most of the way, strapped our backpacks tighter to our backs and jumped over the mud puddles, but you know what time we reached home? 2:15. The usual almost-two-hour trip we made in 1 hour and seven minutes. We have heaven’s inexhaustible supplies at our command! We asked for an extra push, God gave us wings - wings of omnipotence.
February 18
1:00 pm
Phil 3:8;4:9-13
“Yea doubtless, and I count all things but loss for the excellency of the knowledge of Christ Jesus my Lord: for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and do count them but dung, that I may win Christ…”
Nothing else matters.
“Those things, which ye have both learned, and received, and heard, and seen in me, do: and the God of peace shall be with you. But I rejoiced in the Lord greatly, that now at the last your care of me hath flourished again; wherein ye were also careful, but ye lacked opportunity.”
Take every opportunity.
“Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content. I know both how to be abased, and I know how to abound: every where and in all things I am instructed both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need.”
We must learn.
“I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.”
___
I can’t believe the time has come, for me to once again be flying above the clouds, heading home. Then again, the word home is relevant here on this earth. I feel more as if I was leaving home! And that alone makes me sad, because I don’t feel like I’m ready to leave. I’m not ready to say goodbye to my Mashabo brothers and sisters, to “my girls” at Bethany, to the peaceful jungles, the starry nights, the coconuts, the river - to the work that filled my life both with challenges and blessings...and yet, I had to, and I did.
“Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before, I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.”
I wonder if Paul felt the same way. I wonder if he really did “forget those things which are behind” very quickly. For me, they have become a part of who I am. And though I must now “reach forth unto those things which are before,” I cannot forget what I’m leaving behind. Honestly, I don’t know what God has in store for me next. I have no clue what tomorrow will bring. All I know is that my heart is in the jungles. I want to go back. I want to serve, to help, to heal, to save.
Lord, do what you must do with me quickly, train me, teach me, and then take me back. Take me back soon so we can finish this work. I want to go home, for real this time.
12:20 a.m.
“And call upon me in the day of trouble: I will deliver thee, and thou shalt glorify me.” Psalm 50:15. This is the verse God shared with me this morning. And boy, have I been needing it today! If ever there was a “day of trouble” it has occurred in the past 12 hours for me.
Right now I am waiting to board my flight to Guyana. And it’s a very comforting thought to know I am almost on that plane. So many times today I thought it would impossible to make it. And yet, by God’s grace, I am here, weary and tired, but here, nevertheless.
So when I got to the check-in place this afternoon, the lady at the counter simply just did not want to let me through! She was asking for a visa, then documents proving what I’m doing in Guyana, then a returning flight ticket, then for enough money on my debit card that I could buy a ticket when down there….all of which I had none. It was a whole ordeal, that I’d rather put behind me and not go through all the details, but it was so frustrating, I have to say. My flight was to be leaving at 4:20 and by the time she was satisfied enough to let me go, she said I would miss the flight anyway, but rushed me to customs. I went through, got on the shuttle in a frenzy, and looked at my watch: 4:10. There’s no way.
Ran to the gate. Flight’s delayed. Wow. So that was a whole adventure. But it didn’t end there. Not to go into more details, as soon as I got off the plane here in New York, the adventure continued. This time I found another fellow “partner in crime” hehe - a sweet, but desperate young Afghani girl. We found ourselves in the same situation, looking for our carry-on suitcases that the airline had taken and that we were supposed to pick up but had missed the place and weren’t allowed back in. We ran all over the airport, inside, outside, asking 3 dozen people, with each indication making us eventually go in circles, through elevators and terminals, and airtrains, and, whew, after running around together for about two hours we felt a bond that two people can only have when going through such an ordeal. Through a complete miracle, I spotted a lady carrying our bags for second and shouted for her to stop. We collected our bags and tried to recollect ourselves and complete the next mission.
We had to next find our gates. Sound easy? Ha! Not at JFK, 10:30 pm, when everything is closed and everyone’s too tired to care or help you out. The girl pleaded with me to help her, since it was her first time flying alone, and she was “so scared” she told me. So of course, we stuck together. After a lot more running around, we found her gate, but it was too late. She had lost her flight to Dubai. And I had to go and try to make it to mine in time! So after lending her my cellphone so she could call her mom, we exchanged, hugs, kisses, emails and everything and with a broken heart to have to leave her there, I ran for the airtrain.
And here I am. I think I should go check the mirror to see how many grey hairs have appeared since this morning. Oh boy, we’re boarding now! I wonder what craziness will await me next. Lord, help me.
9:15 am
Praise the Lord, I arrived at the mission house, safe and sound, with all my baggage, which is a complete miracle. On the flight, another surprise awaited me, but this time a good one! I recognized Taylor, the girl I had met before, and her family that head up the mission academy here in Guyana - and they had missed their flight and now we were on the same one! So praise the Lord, I didn’t have to get a taxi by myself….whew! God always does know what He’s doing, doesn’t He??
It’s good to be back...even though it’s rainy, but I’m definitely enjoying being back in the warm tropical weather. I look forward to the next several weeks and am expecting more great things to happen. Like Psalms says...from all these troubles, may God be glorified!
January 11 -- Bethany
8:20 pm
It’s a full moon tonight. I can clearly see the clouds in the dark sky, and the sand on campus seems to be alive under the moon’s reflection. All is peace and quiet, except for the occasional laughter and yelling from the girls’ side.
It’s good to be back in the peaceful jungles, away from everything familiar. It’s good, though it’s not my favorite, nor my first choice. I returned here I guess more out of duty than desire, and I don’t think I should feel guilty saying that, because really, the carnal, natural self does not instinctively, knowingly choose the path that is full of self-denial, sacrifice, and the one of toil and out-of-your-comfort-zone day by day experiences. Not at all.
At the same time, I need to count my blessings, though it’s sometimes hard to look past the fact that I’m back to eating white rice, living with one hour of electricity a day, bat poop on my floor, and humidity that sprouts mold on almost everything. Yesterday I took out the box of clothes I had left here and found to my dismay all my things moldy and stained from cockroach excrement - after only three weeks! But what can you do, just get out the tub and start scrubbing as hard as you can!
But the blessings are there, and I don’t mean to sound like a half-empty glasser; I just want to share the reality of mission work. So anyway, there is truly not many greater things than to have your students scream and pounce on you when you show up after the break, and hear them telling of their experiences of when they went back home and the impact they’ve had on their families or in the villages they went to work in and to know that somehow, someway, you’re making a difference directly and indirectly in people’s lives.
There’s nothing much better than being out of the rat-race life, a hectic cycle that has you going going going and at the end of the day you look back and can’t figure out what all you have accomplished in that day. When you’re out here, though, at least you know you fed two dozen people, and may have taught someone something new, and helped a fellow neighbor feel better with their health. It’s worth it, right?
I have to write these things you see, sometimes more for myself, to keep me focused, because honestly I already miss home very much. I wish God could just *whoosh*, erase all memory of my dear ones back home, of the comforts and life I left behind, but it doesn’t work that way. But what He does do is give me the promises I need just to make it through another day - and not just make it, but have joy and fulfillment while I’m going through it, moment by moment. And that alone makes me happy. I guess this is a small example of living a life of faith - a life where your happiness doesn’t come by feelings, but it’s based on a more sure foundation - the Rock of Ages. Praise be to God!
January 16
7:30 pm
What a week it has been! Full of surprises, laughs, and blessings. The greatest blessing for me this week has been knowing that God isn’t done with me yet. He hasn’t given up on me! Even though, let me tell you, wow, I see so much in myself that needs to change: attitudes, desires, thoughts, ugly feelings...and being in the mission field brings out every little poor character trait - that you thought you’d never had to deal with!
I just read over the last entry and became so disappointed in myself for writing such things down, I wanted to erase it all. Really, how can I complain of white rice when I know there’s people out there don’t have food to fill their bellies, or little electricity, when we have so many conveniences, like running water, flushing toilets and showers?
I have been really ungrateful; taking so much for granted, even the awesome opportunities of sharing God’s love with other people who don’t know it. In many countries now the religious liberties are narrowing rapidly and Christians are being slaughtered just for being Christians. And wow, I dare to complain, even if just only in my mind, of having to walk through rain and mud for almost four hours to do one Bible study, or missing a meal or sleep because of evening prayer meetings in the village...God had to severely rebuke me through this evening’s worship on the rebellion of Korah and what a real evil murmuring and complaining is.
On a lighter note, outreach yesterday was really great - going back to Mashabo - it’s been almost a month since I saw my dear friends! This time it was Liz and Kimberly that accompanied me on the treck to the village. We had a nice time visiting, praying with people, seeing my Papi Kenneth again, and doing a Bible study with eager Fazel and his wife, Sharifa. I love studying with them, since he always is full of questions and ready and eager to study the Bible, even if we’re interrupting him from his work or other projects. And I especially love to see the students giving the studies - this was Kimberly’s first one, and it’s always amazing to me how God’s Word alone is so powerful, that anyone, experienced or inexperienced, old or young, bright or dull, can share His truth and through the Holy Spirit have a lasting impact on many souls.
So after we got done visiting and studying with our lovely young friends, and realizing that time had just flown by, we quickly started back for home. The only problem was that we had to get across the Mashabo river. And when we got to the shore, there was no boat and no one home in the nearby houses that could get us across. We had no choice but to wait there, soaking up the hot mid-day sun.
What do you know, though, that soon enough we spotted two little figures out in the middle of the river slowly coming our way. I didn’t get my hopes up very high, because I realized that their little canoe, was indeed a little canoe! These small, dug-out boats are no wider than two feet and about nine feet long - just perfect for little boys and girls that paddle to go to school every day. Well, nevertheless, it was something, and at least one of the boys had a paddle, so there was a glimmer of hope.
I asked the boy with the paddle if we could possible get a ride to the other shore, and, though he was shy and didn’t say anything audibly, I understood from him that we could get in. So we did. Kind of.
Kimberly went in first and made it look like a really easy thing to do - just climb into the canoe, right?! Well, then I tried to get in and sit down but could not keep the thing steady! As I was trying desperately to keep balanced, Liz attempted at sitting down, and just then as we were rocking back and forth, before I knew it, I was out of the canoe and in the water - right there in the shallows by the shore! I was the only one also, that managed to get my whole backside soaked, but oh well, we laughed and tried to think of a different plan.
Kimmy soon had the idea of splitting up - she would go with the other little boy who had just gotten in another small canoe and started paddling toward us - not with a paddle, but just with his hands - it was quite a sight! So she got on with boy #2, and they were soon on their way. Liz I were now trying to follow in their trail, but first had to get all the water out of the now almost-sunken canoe, so Liz now is bailing out the water with a bottle and we try again. Another failed attempt, another quick bath.
As she’s once again back to her bailing job, and I’m wringing out the water from my skirt, all of a sudden I hear this screaming! I look up and there is poor Kimmy - in the water! She’s there in the middle of the river, holding up her purse above the water and laughing and screaming! The canoe is no where to be seen and the little boy’s head is bopping up and down as they’re both now trying to swim back to shore. The whole thing was just so funny, I couldn’t help but laugh for like ten minutes at the sight and knowing that that would’ve been us if we had gotten any farther out from the shore. Wow. I hadn’t laughed so hard in a long time. It was great.
Kimmy made it back to shore safely after being rescued by a boat that just happened to be going by with some worker guys who gave us some strange looks and smiles as they delivered our friend back to dry land but we all had a good laugh and soon we were on the other shore after they kindly offered to give us a ride.
The moral of the story? Little wobbly canoes are not meant for big people. Learned that one pretty quick. The real lesson that’s harder to grasp sometimes is that many times we’re just meant to wait. There’s nothing reasonable for us do, even if it may seem reasonable to us at the moment, but we try to do something anyway, because we’re just too impatient. The answer is right on its way, but sometimes it finds us when we’ve already sunk and gotten ourselves in a muddy mess when all this time we could’ve been patiently waiting on God and trusting that He would take us to the other side instead of trying to go on our own - even setting out without a paddle! Boy, are we headstrong at times. And yes, God in His mercy reminds us - even if has to make us cry - or laugh!
January 28
4:45 pm
“When trials arise that seem unexplainable, we should not allow our peace to be spoiled. However unjustly we may be treated, let not passion arise…If we surrender our lives to His service, we can never be placed in a position for which God has not made provision. Whatever may be our situation, we have a Guide to direct our way; whatever our perplexities, we have a sure Counselor; whatever our sorrow, bereavement, or loneliness, we have a sympathizing Friend.” (COL 172)
This has been my experience - and it makes me so happy!
Many things have been happening the past two weeks, things that put me in the “grind”, and looking back, I know that it was only through the power of God that I can, and do, keep going. So I praise His name I am still alive and well, in high spirits and resting in Him. What a joy it is to serve our Almighty, Loving God!
My days have been filled with doing treatments on Andre, teaching and preparing for class, helping out with Wednesday night small evangelistic meetings up the Essequibo River, giving Bible studies in Mashabo, cooking, gardening, and washing. Life - though it’s got its challenges, it is very fulfilling here.
I am settled - though I have gotten to use the internet just once in the three weeks I’ve been here now, I don’t miss it. Haven’t used a phone or gotten in a car since I left, either, and yet I am happy. I am learning so much here that I know I could not learn anywhere else. Being put in situations that I have never faced before, and my only option is to move forward confidently, has greatly increased my faith and dependance on the wisdom, strength and patience from above. Though I face great tasks, humongous obstacles and intense inner and outward struggles every day, the Lord is telling me, “Say not, ‘I am only a child’”.
So all I am left to do is to advance, not looking behind, but going forward overcoming - overcoming indeed, by the blood of Jesus that washes away my sins (Rev. 12 and Rev. 1:5) and through the “word of my testimony” - my own personal experience with the Lord, constantly moment by moment abiding in Him.
The Lord can not save us from trial, but He can save us from defeat!
February 8
1:00 pm
I love the Lord, because he hath heard my voice and my supplications. Because He hath inclined His ear unto me, therefore will I call upon Him as long as I live.
-Psalm 116:1,2
As I was sitting by the dock at Cobis Landing, looking at my watch for the tenth time, I was trying to reassure myself that I had not made a hasty decision in trying to go out to Georgetown that day. The truth is that Catie and I did leave campus much later than we had hoped for, we had no boat to take us across, and, after reaching Cobis found out that it was shopping day for the people in the village so all the boats had gone out. What were the chances we were going to find a boat to take us to Supenaam? Slim.
So what could we do, other than take off our loaded backpacks, sit down in the shade, and pray that God would send a boat our way. We reminded God (and ourselves) that the trip we were venturing on was for His glory. We had a long list of books, clothes, and supplies we needed to get for the people in Mashabo.
Last Thursday as our group was just leaving Mashabo, dear Auntie Orlinda pulled me aside. “Look,” she said as she pointed to the gaping holes in her shirt, “I am ashamed to wear this, but you know how my husband died a few years back and my sister has her own family to support so this Christmas I received nothing from anybody. Please give me a nice dress suit to wear to church.” I promised her I would do my best and with a heavy heart, I left, more determined that somehow I HAD to go to Georgetown and get Auntie some clothes and the hymnals and other Bible books I had promised the people.
I had decided to leave on Tuesday, but when Monday rolled around and I was done with my class in the morning, I thought, why not leave now? So I asked Catie to join me and after lunch we set off and walked the couple miles to the dock at Cobis. Now, we had to wait. We waited and waited some more. By this time it was 3:00, school let out and the kids were coming towards the dock to get to their canoes and paddle home. I decided to take some pictures of the unique Guyanese “schoolboats” and the children all dressed nicely in their uniforms paddling down the river, when the headmaster came up to me to send a message to Ms. Melissa. I then asked him if he was going by Supenaam and could give us a ride. “Sure,” he said, “just now!” Catie and I looked at each other, with “Praise GOD!” written all over our faces. We got into his boat and as we took off, we bowed our heads and thanked the Lord for answering our prayer and sending us the boat “just in time” - God’s perfect timing.
What joy fills my heart after these little experiences when I see how faithful God is to me in the way He always provides. Yesterday is another example of Isaiah’s inspired words in Isaiah 65:24: And it shall come to pass, that before they call, I will answer; and while they are yet speaking, I will hear.
This past week we had decided that after church on Sabbath, we want to spend more time with the people in Mashabo, visiting and fellow-shipping together because the time we spend on Thursdays never seems to be enough. So we had talked to Fazil and Sharifa and the plan was set - to have lunch at their house after church so we could spend more time in the village instead of hurrying off back to campus half-starved after church.
I was looking forward to this Sabbath all week - I always love spending Sabbaths in Mashabo, with “our little flock” but I knew that this one was indeed going to be special. After another wonderful church service, and greeting the people, Elder Levi and his wife Pearl hand us a bag of food. We hadn’t expected that, since this was the first time anyone’s ever given us food just like that, but we took it gratefully and soon we were over the river and arriving at Fazil’s house - all seven of us, Fazil, his wife and two kids. As we settled in and took out the bowl of rice and chow mein Aunti Pearl had made, it got quiet as we if we were all expecting something to happen but it wasn’t happening. Well, we were expecting something - the food! The little bowl of rice and noodles didn’t seem hardly enough for all twelve of us! But never the less, we asked the Lord’s blessing and started serving ourselves, no one saying anything about the food, but in my mind I was thinking, “What’s going on? Where’s the food Sharifa was to prepare?” After everyone got a humble portion of the food on their plates and we were chatting, Fazil finally admitted, “You know, when you said you would be coming to our house to eat, we thought that YOU were bringing the food!” Oh no! We laughed at our little misunderstanding, but had to acknowledge and praise the Lord that once again He made up for the lack and sent us food - before we had even realized that we would need it!
Indeed, the food was just enough for all of us to be satisfied and quiet our hungry stomachs. However, Fazil was eating his rice quite slowly and thoughtully, and I noticed that he didn’t seem to have much appetite when he looked up suddenly and said,, “So when are we going to have another Bible study? I am more hungry for the Word of God!” I smiled as I thought how full of truth Christ’s words were when He said, “I am the bread of live: he that cometh to Me shall never hunger; and he that believeth on me shall never thirst. Though I was thankful for the physical food, I knew that in a few hours I was going to get hungry again, but there is nothing like feeding on the Word of God, that fills a hunger nothing else can. Soon we were feeding on more of the “Living Bread” as we dove into a Bible study with Fazil on Revelation. The time quickly passed, because before we knew it it was already 5:00 and we knew that if we didn’t leave soon we’d have to walk through the jungle in the dark to get back home. In the end, we did end up having to walk the last portion of the trail just by the scattered moonlight that would shine through the holes in the foliage above, but my heart was full from experiencing the bountiful love of God, that it had no more room for fear of any spooky creatures that may come out at night from the jungle around us, for “perfect love casteth out fear.” As we were walking back, each one of us deep in his own thoughts, Fazil’s words came to my mind - “You know, you all from Bethany did so much for me. I was a Muslim and I would read the Bible, but I could never understand it. Then you guys came and are answering all my questions. I am getting to know the real truth.”
If God sent me to Guyana just for one soul, it would be worth it. I am so happy.
February 12
4:00 pm
“All who consecrate soul, body, and spirit to God will be constantly receiving a new endowment of physical and mental power. The inexhaustible supplies of heaven are at their command...Through co-operation with Christ they are complete in Him, and in their human weakness they are enabled to do the deeds of Omnipotence.” -DA 827
Let me tell you about our deeds of omnipotence!
Today God sent four of us to Mashabo - to some specific people I’ve never even met before. We left early once again, at 6:30 a.m., eating our bananas and bread as we were walking in the rain - it was quite a sight! We’ve decided to take off early on Thursday mornings in order to get as much time with the people as possible, since we have to make it back in time for the students to go to their afternoon class at 2:30 in the afternoon.
After the usual one hour and 45 minutes, we reached our beloved little village, prayed and split up. Andre suggested that Kimberly and I should visit the little house by the headmaster’s place because we’ve never visited the man that lives there. I don’t know why, we’ve just always skipped that little house. Well today was going to be like no other day.
As we came up to the man, we introduced ourselves and asked if we could just visit with him and share some words of encouragement from God’s Word. He smiled and answered with an, “of course!” and as we sat down on his steps and opened our Bibles, he said, “wait a second” and went inside. He came back with a notebook and pencil and said he wants to take down notes! Wow, ok, so I looked at Kimmy and told her, let’s give this man a Bible study!
God led us to bring some encouragement to our dear new friend Gilbert through verses like Matthew 14, Revelation 21, and Acts 1 that speak about Jesus’ second coming and the future life with Him in heaven. As we shared, we found out from him that he’s been living alone for several years, all his children are out of the house, and he stopped going to church four years ago. His next words struck at my heart - “You know, to be honest with you, I’ve seen you guys from Bethany coming by here all the time and I have always been wondering when I’m going to get a visit. But I said, well, I guess it’ll be in the Lord’s timing; and today, you finally came!”
Lord, forgive us for neglecting a soul that has always been right under our noses. No wonder he stopped going to church, if the church members don’t reach out to people like Gilbert. I invited him out to come out on Sabbath and promised him a Bible, which made him very happy.
God next took us over the river, through some trails and straight to brother Isaac’s house - only brother Isaac wasn’t home - his wife was. I had been to his house once before, on a Sunday, when we were waiting for almost a whole afternoon for his wife to come back from church to get a treatment. We had carried towels with us and even a bag of ice, but she never showed up. Poor brother Isaac was so disappointed, and we left with half-sunken hearts, but hoping for another opportunity to see her.
Well, this time we did. And boy, did we find another neglected soul. Auntie Verna was working in her yard when we came up and offered to pray with her and see if we can help with anything. She willingly came and after I asked if there’s anything specific we could pray for, she spilled her great burden to us; “Yes,” she said, “please pray for my son-in-law. You see, just yesterday he was cursing me because I go to church.” She told us the whole story with tears in her eyes - how nobody was visiting her and she was sick and still had to work hard and then the Full Gospel church people came along some months ago and they visited her and prayed with her and how she felt better afterwords, so she started to go to their meetings and church services but now her son is angry and….well, what could we do other than to sit her down and open the Word of God to her!
And what a blessing that little meeting was, for afterwords, she looked like a burden had been lifted off her back. We read to her the blessings in Matthew 5, when Jesus tells us that we are blessed when we are persecuted for righteousness’ sake, and how we must bless those that curse us and pray for our enemies and do good to those that despitefully use us and say all manner of evil against us.
Oh how she was soaking up every word, for you see, Aunti Verna is losing her eyesight as well and cannot read so whenever someone can read to her the words from the Bible is like a fountain of water filling dry ground. And what joy fills my heart to know that another thirsty soul was able to drink some of the Living Water!
She then treated us to some very refreshing coconut water from her coconut tree and asked us if we could somehow help her little granddaughter suffering from some sort of infection in her leg. We took a look at the little six-year-old girl and Kimmy immediately recognized it as Filaria - a worm parasite that enters into your skin and causes fever and terrible rashes. We happened to have our medicine bag with us, so we made a charcoal poultice and applied it, giving her instructions on some other simple treatments Iona can do to help heal her daughter’s now swollen leg. Unfortunately, once the parasite enters the body, supposedly it never comes out, so all you can do is just keep the symptoms under control.
So yes, today was really a blessing. We also counseled our friend __ suffering from sever hypertension, to stop eating so much salt, white flour, sugar and fried foods. We gave her a back a foot massage and told her to drink plenty of water. We also saw and treated my little friend Renneatte, who had fever and diarrhea and another family we came across in a little hut that were all sick with the flu. There is so much need and so little time!
So God did another miracle for us. Since we visited so many people today, before we knew it, the time was 1:00 - way past the time we were supposed to leave - and we were on the other side of the river! We had to quickly say goodbye to our friends and take off for home. However, realizing that it would be humanly impossible to reach campus by 2:30, class time, our only hope was to grasp the hand of omnipotence. So we prayed that God would somehow give us the speed to make it back in time and not cause any problems with the teacher.
We bowed our heads as Andre prayed in faith that we would reach back by 2:15 - and you know what? - God never fails! Yes, we did our part - we did run most of the way, strapped our backpacks tighter to our backs and jumped over the mud puddles, but you know what time we reached home? 2:15. The usual almost-two-hour trip we made in 1 hour and seven minutes. We have heaven’s inexhaustible supplies at our command! We asked for an extra push, God gave us wings - wings of omnipotence.
February 18
1:00 pm
Phil 3:8;4:9-13
“Yea doubtless, and I count all things but loss for the excellency of the knowledge of Christ Jesus my Lord: for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and do count them but dung, that I may win Christ…”
Nothing else matters.
“Those things, which ye have both learned, and received, and heard, and seen in me, do: and the God of peace shall be with you. But I rejoiced in the Lord greatly, that now at the last your care of me hath flourished again; wherein ye were also careful, but ye lacked opportunity.”
Take every opportunity.
“Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content. I know both how to be abased, and I know how to abound: every where and in all things I am instructed both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need.”
We must learn.
“I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.”
___
I can’t believe the time has come, for me to once again be flying above the clouds, heading home. Then again, the word home is relevant here on this earth. I feel more as if I was leaving home! And that alone makes me sad, because I don’t feel like I’m ready to leave. I’m not ready to say goodbye to my Mashabo brothers and sisters, to “my girls” at Bethany, to the peaceful jungles, the starry nights, the coconuts, the river - to the work that filled my life both with challenges and blessings...and yet, I had to, and I did.
“Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before, I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.”
I wonder if Paul felt the same way. I wonder if he really did “forget those things which are behind” very quickly. For me, they have become a part of who I am. And though I must now “reach forth unto those things which are before,” I cannot forget what I’m leaving behind. Honestly, I don’t know what God has in store for me next. I have no clue what tomorrow will bring. All I know is that my heart is in the jungles. I want to go back. I want to serve, to help, to heal, to save.
Lord, do what you must do with me quickly, train me, teach me, and then take me back. Take me back soon so we can finish this work. I want to go home, for real this time.
Guyana 2008
Tuesday, September 23 – Bethany
1:44 pm
The trip here to Bethany was incredible! At least the speedboat ride was...riding that boat with the waves splashing along its sides, threatening to get you wet and at times actually succeeding, smelling all sorts of smells, from the BO of the passengers in front to the flowers along the river to the smoke of frying something in the nearby huts. All this taking place at the most perfect time of day - sunset.
I arrived here on Bethany campus last night around 8, along with five others - Gilbert Sissons, the director of the school, and adventurous couple that bungee jump and hang glide and do wilderness survival, Michael and Lauren, Michael’s brother, Aaron, another adventurous volunteer, and Audrea, a girl from Jamaica/England who will be a student at the school.
The campus is quite nice. Primitive, but in some ways not as much as i had expected. We have showers and flushing toilets, however, we still have to wait for the sinks and must brush teeth in the shower, which by the way, does not have two knobs, one for hot or cold - just one = one temperature. All the buildings on campus are raised up high on stilts and have no glass windows or doors between rooms. Privacy here is minimal.
I took a little walk in the woodsy jungle forest (not sure what to call it yet) and heard many creatures, whether they were scurrying in the brush (couldn’t make out what they were) or exotic birds singing their songs. The other missionaries have been telling me stories of pythons and alligators (they have specific names for the different species around here, but I can’t recall) and piranhas, not to mention the Puma that has supposedly been roaming around the campus at night.
The weather so far has been bearable, thanks to the soft breeze that greets us every now and then. I haven’t had much appetite yet, probably from the humidity and hot climate that I still have to get used to. So far the only cooked food I’ve had has been some white rice with dal and a potato/TVP curry, which tasted pretty good. I am looking forward to eating some more fruit, though.
Now for the important facts: tomorrow I start teaching. I was supposed to start today, but they were merciful in giving me a little bit more time considering the fact that I just arrived and hadn’t even looked at the material for the classes yet. I did spend some time this morning trying to put some thoughts together for my surprise class: NEWSTART. Melissa did give me some books and syllabuses from various institutions and now the challenge is to compile all the information into an organized manner to be able to wisely teach these classes for the whole year, and for future use by BMMC. I must once again get back to work.
8:39 pm
Tonight for worship I spoke on being content, thanking the Lord for whatever may come our way. I was told I was to be working outside in the afternoon, shoveling sand around the trees to irrigate them. When i went to the shed to get a shovel, i was disappointed to find out there were no more shovels, so I had to grab the remaining tool - a hoe. “This is going to be interesting,” I thought, but was determined to do my best, with whatever tool. I soon got to work, and after a few trees, i realized that i had the best tool for the job. Sometimes we may be envious of other people’s “shovels” or wish that we had other better talents or be in better circumstances, but wait a second - God knows what’s best for us, right? If you’re given a hoe, thank Him and start working!
So, i was grateful for the hoe. However, soon I started to feel my feet being bitten and I looked down to find out that Sr. Gilbert was right - fire ants, all over the place. Ok Lord, I guess i have to thank you for the ants as well, and the hot burning sun, and even the cockroaches. In no time, it started pouring down rain. No more hot burning sun, and, no more ants. I continued my work outside, happily working on the compost pile, in the cool midday shower.
I’m hoping i’ll get to fly in the little plane soon. The airstrip is very close to the campus and this afternoon Liz and I ran over there in hopes to see the plane land. We were a little too late (also a little out of breath also - need to get back in shape while i’m here!), but at least we got to watch it take off. And Mr Gary, the head pilot, told us he’d love to take us up whenever he’s around and we get some time off! Can’t wait...
Tomorrow i teach. Well, at least i’ll do an introduction and spend some time getting to know the students. I’d like to get a feel of what they’re here for, how much they know and what they’re interested in learning. I am a little nervous, but excited to be back working with kids (well, they are older than me, most of them, but i’ll try to keep that a secret from them as long as i can...).
Wednesday, Sept. 24
6:30 pm
The sun sets around 6:00 here in Guyana. After that, it gets dark quick and without electricity it’s very hard to do much of anything. Last night we witnessed a terrible thunder storm that shook the whole building and lighted up the sky like i’ve never seen before. Since we don’t have windows, i felt like the wind was going to hurl me and my bed into the sky at any moment. It was also very hard to sleep with the torrential rain pounding on the tin roof, making you feel as if you were inside a big drum.
There were quite a few advantages of the storm, though, one of the big ones being the cooler weather (still plenty humid, though) which made working out in the garden from 2-5 a lot more bearable. I hope i’m not making life here sound like it’s been so hard, because really it isn’t that tough - just have to get used to not having the same conveniences as before. I’m just describing a little of the conditions we’re under, but i had quite a lot of fun today: teaching, which went great, hoeing the beds that have been somewhat neglected and were full of weeds, sorting out the seeds to plant, mealtimes, talking with the students and fellow staff members, praying with the staff in the morning for a student that already wants to leave, playing frisbee...I really am enjoying my new life here.
I really must get to studying for my class tomorrow...20 minutes more until the lights come on.
Tuesday, Sept. 30
6:45 pm
Ok, so I’ve been enjoying myself these past few days. Sabbath was very nice - after the sermon which carried on into the afternoon, several of us went out for a hike in the jungle. I soon started regretting i didn’t follow my natural instincts and had decided to wear sneakers. Imagine! Anyway, the hike ended up taking us through some beautiful scenery, over rivers, and mud piles and huge wood ant hills, past poisonous apple trees and long vines and a score of other plants and creatures I have never seen in my life.
Sunday was a great day as well, as I got to meet new people, see different sights, and ride the speedboats again! Melissa took all of us female staff to a health fair, where we presented charcoal and granola, and gave massages - lots of massages! At least we were in the shade, but it was still unmercifully hot. I felt quite weird to be in the city again, to see cars, large crowds, lots of food... One of the greatest highlights i must admit, was entering that air conditioned internet cafe. Feeling for a little while connected in some way with my friends and family from back home almost brought tears to my eyes! I am not kidding! I don’t know why the first five days felt like I had been here five months...
But now i can say i have adjusted and am truly enjoying the simple pleasures of life here at Bethany. Classes are going great (hopefully my students feel the same way). Quizzes are being taken, questions are being asked, information is being entered into those marvelous brains. I hope i can make my classes as practical and applicable as possible, so the students may be adequately prepared to go out, educating and helping everyone they come in contact with. I can’t wait until we go on outreaches!
One of these days we’re supposed to be getting our first patient - a lady diagnosed with cervical cancer. I can’t wait to help out with her treatments since i don’t have much experience with cancer patients. Captain Gary was just telling us the other day about the lady he had to fly back home because she was dying and there was nothing more the doctors could do for her. He described the tumor that was growing out of her shoulder as being the size of a melon. Her poor young kids will be left without a mother soon.
Tomorrow is my kitchen day again. Last time i was on kitchen duty, on Friday, i was cooking away for almost 12 hours straight, only taking breaks to grab something to eat myself. Whew! It is not easy to cook for a whole campus with a very limited variety of ingredients and produce, no electricity, and a little oven that takes forever to bring a pot of water to boil. But we do our best, and we’re all learning (especially us spoiled Americans) how to truly be content, like it says in 1 Timothy 5. After all, we do have food and raiment, right? Some students were even exclaiming that here they eat like kings and queens compared to the skimpy, simple meals of rice and cassava they’ve been used to all their lives.
After being here a week, i am getting a feel of what it really means to be a full-time missionary overseas. Why have i never seen this from any of the other mission trips i’ve been on? The Sissons were just sharing with us staff last evening some things about the situation here. To be a missionary means that you’ll probably run out of any savings you’ve accumulated soon after you move and start serving overseas. It means day by day you’re taking care of people, problems, your institution, making sure everyone stays happy and encouraged, which is not an easy task when you’re dealing with human beings. It means you might be stuck in the kitchen all day, or hoeing in the hot sun, when you’re not preparing to teach or going out to do visitations in the villages. It means you consume, very little compared to what you’re used to consuming, and yet still cannot produce enough to ensure your own family has enough nutrients in the food their eating to stay healthy and well. To be a missionary is to be a sacrificer. It means to be strong, to stay strong, and depend on the strength of a much more powerful Being to make it through the day. I have a lot of admiration for these missionaries. I wonder if I can ever be that strong.
Saturday, October 4
9:00 pm
Just finished hugging all my girls and singing to them the “Goodnight, little creep” song. Ah, what joys fill my heart each and every day. There’s nothing like living in the middle of the jungle, teaching bright young minds, working hard all day, and then playing hard all evening, hehe! We just finished an intense game of volleyball in the dark (our campus is all sand, so it’s perfect!).
The other day as i was walking on the little path that leads to the small nearby village with my Venezuelan friend, i couldn’t help but smile at how my life-long dream is becoming reality: walking through the jungle, going to see a patient in her little one-room hut and giving simple treatments with whatever we could find around. For instance, the lady’s husband got us some “clay” from the nearby river for a charcoal poultice to place on her liver. We used some towels and heated up some water to give her a hydrotherapy treatment as she was lying on the floor of the wood hut. Simple and primitive, yes, but she says she’s been feeling relieved of some of her pain since we started the treatments! Praise the Lord, because Hepatitis is not a fun disease.
I’ll be visiting our cancer patient soon as well. I did see her yesterday when a couple of us went over to sing and pray with her and there’s no doubt about it - the cancer is eating away at her life. She is all skin and bones, can barely smile, and just looks like one of the frailest people i’ve ever seen. I do hope and pray we’ll be able to help her somehow.
Other than that, the campus continues to be alive. The students are all energetic, happy kids and i like them a lot. We’re all grateful also for the crate that just arrived this week. It had a whole bunch of supplies, class material (including the books for my classes - yay!), a freezer, some much-needed kitchen appliances, hydrotherapy fomentations, massage table, and other goodies. It was like Christmas in October. A very hot October. Santa must have been burning up in that suit of his coming down here to deliver our crate. Anyway...
I guess i’m starting to get corny - what do you know, it’s waaay past my bedtime: 9:30! It’s been quite some time since i went to bed this late....but i had to get some lines in, now when there’s finally some peace and quiet. But even now...i’m getting tired of all the moths and crazy insects that keep flocking my bright computer screen...time to get some zzz’s.
Thursday, October 9
9:00 am
The days are starting to go by very fast. I guess that’s what happens when you keep busy. Wednesdays are our outreach days, at least for the staff now. Once the students advance more in their classes and learn to diagnose and do some various treatments, we will begin taking them as well. For now, however, the few staff who have some spare time on their hands are going out to the nearby villages. At the one “nearby” village we went to yesterday was a neat experience. Five of us took off for the five mile trek right after breakfast.
As we were nearing our destination, a man suddenly came into our view - a long-haired man running toward us with a huge machete in his hand! His long hair flowing in the wind, shirt opened to reveal sun-darkened skin, and feet bare that made his sprinting look like he was putting in no effort at all. If we had been anywhere else, we may have exclaimed some surprised astonishment at the sight or at least our hearts might have skipped a beat. As I am recalling now, neither of those events occurred. We simply allowed him to pass us, greeting him with the usual “Good morning” and continued on our way, chuckling a bit at the fact that some of us had thought for a brief moment that it was Kurt, one from our group that was a little ahead, that was running for his life. But other than that, the man was just a part of the usual scenery. A few seconds after the man ran past, a tractor full of farm workers sped by, as if it was chasing the machete sprinter, but every man and woman on board was smiling in greeting to us, as if nothing unusual was taking place.
We split up into two groups once we arrived, prayed, and went off to find some people we could talk to and hopefully offer some help. Soon we stopped in front of a big tree under where three women and their children were sitting on the ground peeling basket-fulls of cassava in the shade. Since I was appointed the unofficial “nurse” in the group, I asked the ladies some questions regarding their health and soon found out one lady had problems with her eyes, (it looked like a sever case of pink eye, since they hadn’t done anything for her eyes, and the lady admitted she had had it for “quite a while”, whatever that may mean in their time reference), one felt weakness and dizzy throughout the day, and the other after taking her blood pressure, had indeed a very high pressure. I wish we had been better prepared so we could at least leave some herbs, garlic, or poultices with them, but we promised we would return next week with the supplies. At least now we know a little more of what to expect and bring next time.
To be any type of health/medical personnel here is quite challenging. Especially if you are used to working in a place where you have whatever you need at your fingertips, trying to do much of anything here requires a lot more time, effort, and patience. For example, doing treatments on our cancer patient, Ms. Lila. I’m “on duty” every Tuesday, so two days ago I would go down to her place every hour, with either buckets of hot water, an antioxidant drink, vegetable broth, cleansing smoothie, charcoal poultice, or whatever else she may require. I was also assigned Stacy that day to help me and for her to learn the different procedures. I was talking to Ms. Lila, waiting for Stacy to arrive, but after a few minutes I look up and there she is standing by the door and almost in tears.
When I asked her what was wrong, she softly replied, as if in terror, “Miss, please, I cannot go in. It smells so bad that I feel like vomiting!” I excused her and told her not to worry, but then i realized she was right - Ms. Lila’s cervical cancer putrefied her surroundings and I’m sure she herself is not ignorant of this fact. I cannot begin to imagine the daily pain she is in, and also the mental anguish, embarrassment, and moment by moment trial she is facing just because she’s alive and conscious. This little incidence made me more determined to help her and ignore all the discomforts that may come my way.
Today is Natoya’s birthday and I wanted to make it really special for her. Though we don’t have any cake candles, balloons, streamers, ice cream or pizza, the girls and I decided to give it our best. So, I must go now and attempt to bake that pineapple banana cake!
Friday, October 17
“We are living in the most solemn period of this world’s history. The destiny of earth’s teeming multitudes is about to be decided. Our own future well-being and also the salvation of other souls depend upon the course which we now pursue. We need to be guided by the Spirit of truth. Every follower of Christ should earnestly inquire: “Lord, what wilt Thou have me to do?” We need to humble ourselves before the Lord, with fasting and prayer, and to meditate upon His word, especially upon the scenes of the judgment. We should now seek a deep and living experience in the things of God. We have not a moment to lose. Events of vital importance are taking place around us: we are on Satan’s enchanted ground. Sleep not, sentinels of God; the foe is lurking near, ready at any moment, should you become lax and drowsy, to spring upon you and make you his prey.” GC 601
If ever we were living in the time of the end, it is now. I am fully convinced of this fact. Many of you expressed your desire to me to go into the mission field and serve the Lord. Some of you said, “But first I must do this or that...” So before I go on to tell about my experiences this past week, I first have to urge you - don’t wait! Don’t wait for a better moment, it is now. Don’t hesitate when the Lord calls, like did Lot, for because of his hesitancy his wife was turned into salt. Don’t be like the five foolish virgins, who were, like their other five friends, waiting for the bridegroom, yet did not fulfill their necessary preparations and woke up when it was too late; or the foolish servant who says in his heart, “my lord delayeth his coming.” Friends - He is coming so soon!
Last night we were reading with horror the persecution that is now taking place in southern India. The Christians got blamed for the murders of some Hindu missionaries and now the Hindus are revolting, in a 14 day massacre of the Christians. Many have died a martyrs death already. Orphanages and churches are being destroyed, while many times the staff, students, directors and pastors are being burnt alive inside. Croatia passed the Sunday Law and on January 1, 2009 it will be enforced. We cannot continue to blind ourselves to the fact that things are happening. Fast. And we must not lose time. Who knows how long God’s mercy will hold on? Who knows when these things will hit Guyana? Or America? Or the entire world?
“The season of distress and anguish before us will require a faith that can endure weariness, delay, and hunger - a faith that will not faint though severely tried. The period of probation is granted to all to prepare for that time.” GC 621
I cannot tell you how happy I am to be here, for I know that I am in the center of God’s will. Not only that, but I am realizing with each and every day that this is my boot camp to prepare me for the war ahead. Here you experience weariness. Mentally, physically, socially, physically - draining, an exhaustion you feel in your very bones. Delay - no more in the fast-paced society of the developed lands, here your patience is tried. Also when you are put in situations that make you totally dependent on God, you must learn to handle the “delay”, as we might think of it, in waiting for the Lord to answer. About the hunger - it’s really not that bad. We still have enough to put some food out on the table three times a day. Sure, it’s very basic food, really simple and limited like i mentioned before, but am I glad for it! This simple living, going from day to day depending on the Lord builds one’s faith like nothing else. I take this preparation with a glad heart, knowing that when times indeed get tough, it won’t be like trying to adjust from a majestic palace to a desert shack. Let’s not forget in what times we’re living in.
9:45 am
Yesterday was the highlight of my week, hands-down. It was World Food Day (though I had never heard of this “world” holiday before) and the government health worker that was supposed to do the program called to say she wasn’t going to make it, so was asking our school to send someone to take her place. Melissa asked me to put the nutrition program together for a primary school in the next town and I gladly accepted, very much looking forward to teach littler ones again. Besides having to wake up at 4:30 in the morning, the day was splendid. I asked another lady here to come along and together with Kurt who drove the boat and Andre and Natoya who had to go see the doctor for her prenatal checkup, we went into Supanaam and from there to Suddie.
We didn’t have to be at the school until 10, so we had plenty of time after dropping off Natoya at the hospital. While on yet another infamous internet hunt, we came across a man who was selling watermelon by the side of the road. Oh, what a glorious sight that was! We split the cost, found a table in town and filled our empty bellies with a nice big piece of the juicy, red fruit. Why this was so exciting is that because whenever we do get fruit at the school, like watermelon and pineapple, one fruit gets divided up between the whole campus - all 30 of us. And mind you, these are not Wal-Mart fruit, injected with who-knows-what to make them so big and plump and artificial. So you can imagine the “feast” of fruit we had that day compared to our usual portion.
As we were taking turns using the one internet computer we found, the rest of us went to the Suddie “market” - where one would find about three booths selling various produce, crackers, juice, and candy. There we found another treasure - mangoes! The girls had gotten me three mangoes a couple days ago, but I still haven’t eaten one bite of mango since I got here. One I gave away, and my other two I had forgotten in the cafeteria, never to see again. But now I was standing in front of a whole abundance of them and quickly stocked up. I am eagerly waiting to see them ripen. Oh, and I also have some guavas that a nice taxi driver handed me yesterday, saying, “for the white lady.” I thought maybe there were some strings attached - but no - he just gave me that bag full of guavas and even charged less than usual for the taxi ride! There are some not-so-greedy taxi drivers around here after all!
It soon became time to make our way to the school. Upon arriving, I heard a chorus of “Good morning, miss,” and a bunch of giggles. Nothing warms my heart as much as a group of little munchkins in their neat little school uniforms looking up at me with eager, curious faces, ready to learn and play. So that’s exactly what we did. I wasn’t expecting to be doing a program for the whole school, with students of a variety of ages, but then again, you never do know what to expect beforehand. We just gave it our best and they seemed to have enjoyed the program.
After being properly introduced, I began by asking the kids - “Ok, so who in here likes to eat?” I smiled as I quickly realized that we were standing in front of a very energetic and eager bunch of students. Ms. Jerri and I began talking about the digestive system and had them all copy us in demonstrating with our hands how the food enters the mouth, and then goes through the esophagus, and so on. Then we covered the nutrients and played a fun little game with them; whenever we’d call out - “Protein!”, they would have to GROW, grow, grow. Fats was GLOW glow glow and carbs, GO, go go! Anyway, it was fun. After our little presentation and activities were done we watched the rest of the program, which included a little choir of kids singing a song about food, two girls dancing to some very interesting Indianish music, and a skit with the moral of: “If you want to eat, grow your own food!” It was quite amusing. Unfortunately, all too soon we had to leave the school and come back home.
Now being Friday, I must hurry and finish all the many tasks i have to do today - finish washing my accumulating pile of dirty laundry, put together the Sabbath School health presentation and AY program for tomorrow, help out in the kitchen, meet the health worker that’s coming soon, and hopefully get to visit Mailyn, the lady we were doing treatments on in the village whom we thought had Hepatitis. However, she finally got a doctor’s diagnosis and found out the main problem is gallbladder stones - still very painful, but thankfully, not as dangerous. I am looking forward to Sabbath, though it looks like this one won’t be so relaxing...
Thursday, October 23
Yesterday was a crazy day. Calwin, Liz, and I left at 7:30 am to go into Machabo again. This time we did not encounter any machete-running men, but our trip was not free of adventure nevertheless. After the two-hour walk, we visited the one acre piece of land that we had cleared on Sunday. The whole school body had gone down to clear this beautiful field right by the big river that had been donated to Bethany to set up a mission house. Machabo is a village where the people are very open to the truth, but we must go through this open door while it still remains open because already other denominations are going in to evangelize and teaching some very wrong doctrines. So yes, we worked hard - clearing trees, thorny brush, stumps and other debris by hand. We had a couple machetes and handsaws, but other than that, nothing, not even gloves! After spending all morning working though, we got to relax and go swimming in the big river - and boy, did we swim! A couple of us braved to go to the other side, but we got wiped out after reaching half-way and decided to turn around. You can imagine that after such a day, full of hard work and swimming under the hot sun, we were all exhausted and ready to crash when we got back on campus in the evening. What a day!
Saturday was a full day as well, but I praise God it all went well! For Sabbath school we had an excellent presentation by Calwyn on the brain and the sanctuary, Andre preached a super sermon, and AY was a success. I wasn’t sure how ready the students were, with only a couple weeks of classes, to do their presentations, but they did a great job and everyone that came out said they learned a lot and were happy they came. Praise the Lord!
Anyway, back to yesterday. So we visited the people in their humble abodes, asking them about their health, giving out supplies, advice, and plenty of counsel. Usually that’s really what they need most - to be educated on living a better lifestyle. I very happy this time we also got to do Bible studies with the people - we gave about five studies, on different topics that we saw might benefit them personally.
I met Patrick for the first time. Patrick is completely blind, since about seven years ago, but that doesn’t stop him from working, laughing, and being excited about life. We had a wonderful conversation with him and a great study as well and we could tell he really is allowing the Lord to work in his life. He has seven children but the woman he’s living with is not his wife. He wants to get married, but has no birth certificate so we told him we would help him with acquiring the papers for it so he can go ahead and do the right thing and get married!
A cassette player had been donated to him, so he was very excited when we delivered that to him because from now on he can listen to the Bible on tape. He also has a little green parrot that is very friendly and comes to us, sits on our fingers and pecks at our clothes. Totally cute!
After visiting everyone and delivering their stuffs, we walked the five miles back to campus and arrived around 3:00, just in time to find out that our friends who were going to take us into Supanaam (where the internet is) had already left! We quickly grabbed some bananas to eat on the way (hadn’t eaten anything all day) and started walking - again. We walked, we ran, we speed-walked and finally arrived at the dock when we were told the boat had left ten minutes ago. You can imagine the disappointment. We had been walking from 7 in the morning till 4 and that last bit had given everything we got. Now we had to turn around and walk back to campus. Oh well, God knows, right?
We got back, i rested on my bed for 15 minutes because i really couldn’t move anymore, from sheer exhaustion and hunger. Had some dinner, revived, and started our usual Bible studies after worship, when Mr. Gilbert called Calwyn. He came running back and told us the news: a former student that was temporarily staying here in the dorm had just injected some poison into herself and they had to rush her to the hospital. Oh Lord, what next?
Please pray for our school. People around here are very superstitious and already there have been nasty rumors circulating that we are going to be the next “Jim Jones catastrophe” and that we take people here to brain wash them and eventually kill them and suck their blood or who knows what else these people are thinking. Last year they had a lot more exciting things happen - girls with demons, another student actually succeeded in commiting suicide, and a whole bunch of nonsense. The enemy is trying hard to discredit our work, but our leader is
Tuesday, November 4 – Mashabo
4:20 pm
Where to begin? It’s been quite some time since i updated and soo so much has happened since! I’ve been so busy I haven’t even gotten to jot down the latest happenings, but as now I have some spare moments, i must write.
Great things are happening in Mashabo, the little village five miles away from Bethany. A few of us have been taking turns going a couple times a week to continue our visits there, encouraging the people, helping them out with their health and sharing the precious truths of God’s Word. Then one day about two weeks ago Calwyn said that we must hold an evangelistic crusade in Mashabo! So last week we were in some deep preparation: Calwyn had to make sure we had some sort of power source for at least two light bulbs (the village has absolutely no electricity - we had to bring a generator), speak to our bosses, the Sissons and work out all the details there, as well as with the church pastors. I was in charge of the food we were going to take with us for the week, designing and printing out the flyers and “posters” to advertise the event; preparing the “Health Nuggets”, also organizing the speakers, the program altogether and all those other details - and there are quite a bit of details to work out! But somebody has to take the initiative and make things happen. So i’m so glad to be helping out with whatever i can - and believe me, the mission field will pull out of you any little talent or knowledge that you might ever have had!
So anyway, last week was full of planning, printing, and praying (hehe), on top of all the rest of the responsibilities. At times the thoughts came in my mind, “Anca, what are you thinking, trying to put on such a thing? You have no experience holding any evangelistic meetings...” and some other doubtful thoughts, but i couldn’t let them remain in my brain for long. We have to just keep going, keep pushing, keep praying, and keep working. So that’s what we did. Tonight will be our fourth meeting.
The meetings have been going great! On average, we’ve had about 25 adults show up with about 30-40-55 kids - the numbers going up each evening. The Lord has really been blessing our efforts, but we could not have been getting the results we have been without the sacrifice and work. For example, on Friday five of us (the pioneers, hehe) were ready to go camp out and start the meetings- we had cooked and prepared our food, packed our clothes, generator, lights, guitar, books, mattresses and sheets to sleep on, tents, and some other stuff that was going to carry us through the week. Obviously it would be impossible for us to carry all the stuff walking, so Sr. Gilbert agreed to give us a ride with the tractor to transport all our supplies and things. We waited and waited and waited some more and no tractor. Finally it was getting too late and we knew we had to go and reach there in time to start out the meeting that evening. So we quickly repacked and gathered as much stuff as we could carry and started on our way, hoping the tractor would come with the rest of our things the next day.
Since we had been delayed, we had to walk most of the way in the dark, which wasn’t so bad, but when we did finally reach Mashabo and saw the whole village all dark and the place where we were supposed to hold the meetings all deserted, I wanted to cry.
“Lord, give me strength! I know You’ve carried us this far, You won’t let us down now - after all, it’s all for Your names’ sake and glory!”
That was a tough night. We were all tired from the walk and carrying so much stuff and it was hard not to be discouraged at the fact that we couldn’t start as soon as we had hoped. But my teammates and I were not going to be discouraged; we got ourselves situated in the second floor of a health clinic the people were allowing us to use for the week, got out some bananas, filled our stomachs somewhat, and then just crashed on the hard wood floor and tried to get some sleep.
God always fulfills His promises. I am learning what great faith means. It means simply taking God at His Word, and when He gives us a great promise, great faith means to claim it, depend on it, and believe God’s Word will do what it says. So the next evening we had a great turnout. People came early and afterwords said they were so glad that we had come.
Now each day here in Mashabo is full of work - that must be split up between only about 4-6 of us, as some come and others must leave and go back to Bethany for classes or other responsibilities. I can only smile at the way our program goes: since half the team (that would mean about two or three people) is out with the kids, keeping the occupied with singing songs, telling stories and playing games, that leaves only about three of us to hold the meetings. So someone will do the Song Service, then we have Welcome and Announcements, after which I go up to do the prize drawings and someone else might do the Questions and Answers. Then I will give the health nugget and following that the special music and then the main speaker comes up and gives the sermon. We rotate as much as we can, but if there’s only so many of us, we’re getting to the point of getting off the stage and then coming right back on to do the next part of the program! I personally think it’s quite amusing...Anyway, overall it’s been a tremendous blessing to be a part of such an event, to help bring precious souls to their Saviour - what a privilege!
Wednesday, November 5 – Mashabo
9:00 am
Wow! Great news from Mashabo! Last night over 60 kids came out - and just about the same number of adults! Praise GOD! One little girl said she even got in contact with her grandparents which live up the river a ways and told them to come out to our meetings, so yesterday they paddled the eight miles from their home to come all the way to Mashabo! The word is spreading and we’re greatly encouraged and excited to see what’s happening.
This morning we also got some news from the United States - Obama is president!! Some of us here have been discussing the possibilities and Andre was saying that he thinks Obama would be elected, so to make “the world wonder after the beast.” Since Bush greatly increased the anti-America feelings worldwide, there would have to be a new person coming up whose charisma and personality and principles would bring the world back to a general well-liking of the country, so that the events that must take place will be carried forward from this great and mighty “beast.” Yay Obama! Yay Sunday Law! I’m really looking forward to witnessing the rapid events that are soon to be unfolded.
Saturday, November 8
1:30 pm
As I think about tonight being our last meeting here in Mashabo, I know for sure that I’m going to miss this place a lot - of course we’ll be coming back to continue our visitations and do follow-up work, but it won’t be the same as living here:
Here, where you won’t find any showers or toilets, where to wash yourself you must go to the nearby “creek” and bathe with the fishies swimming around your feet and hope that it will only be fishies swimming around your feet. Here, where the mosquitoes and biting flies are vicious, having no mercy when they find a foreigner’s sweet blood and leave pelts on your skin by the hundreds. It’s being here that made me truly thankful for what we had at Bethany - all the conveniences like electricity for two hours a day, nice showers, clean toilets, a real kitchen and food to cook in the kitchen.
At the beginning of the week we had brought two boxes of fruits, vegetables, rice, beans, chow mein, and some other items, but ever since Wednesday our little stock has slowly been vanishing before our eyes, until we got to the point of having lunch consist of some boiled plantain and a few small potatoes with a little salt and garlic sprinkled on top, some rice and steamed cabbage. Yesterday we had some flour leftover and decided to add some oil and water and salt and make ourselves some tortillas which we had with boiled plantain and some popcorn. Today we just finished our last bits of tortillas with garlic and a few carrots and cucumbers that our friends brought us when they came last night. And you know what? -I’m loving it!! Somehow the simpleness of life here, trusting that the Lord will indeed provide for our needs (one quickly realizes the difference between want and need in a place like here) has been an experience that I can truly thank God for.
To get together with a few other friends, make a fire, put on some water to boil and throw in the last of the vegetables you have for a while, eat, clean up in the river, and go about your day with a truly grateful and happy heart is a wonderful thing. I guess I’ve just found living to be a wonderful thing. Living for God is 100 times better. And living with the hope that soon the day will come when we will be living with God is just indescribable. I can’t wait.
I have nothing on this earth. Nothing to hold me back, nothing that will require a struggle to let go of when i must choose between “it” and the eternal riches awaiting me. The ten virgins trimmed their lamps, signifying cutting off anything that hindered them from meeting their bridegroom. Yet, “it” may not be something material. “It” can be any little unconfessed, secret sin. “It” may even be clothed it good works yet lacking the fruit of the spirit, of which the five wise virgins were not able to impart with their fellow foolish sisters since they had not been preparing and working out their salvation with fear and trembling. Friends, “Watch therefore, for ye know neither the day nor the hour wherein the Son of man cometh...and behold, I come quickly; and my reward is with me to give every man according as his work shall be...blessed are they that do his commandments.”
Sunday, November 16
5:00 pm
Chiggers, seizures, Dengue Fever, rusty nails in feet, sliced fingers, biting ants, razor grass, puma tracks, iguanas, and girls dorm bats: what do they all have in common? I’m not sure, other than they’ve all been part of my past week’s experience.
No, i never had the seizures, fever, or rusty nails, but i sure got to work with those that did! What I did have was the chiggers. Allow me to tell you about these tiny little pests that have fallen in love with my feet. My handy-dandy dictionary could not have given a better definition: “a tiny mite whose parasitic larvae live under the skin of warm-blooded animals, where they cause irritation and dermatitis.” Sounds fun, doesn’t it?
Actually, it has been fun, digging into my feet with safety pins and nail clippers and pulling out the sticky larvae eggs, sometimes even watching black puss ooze out from my toes. It was fun, say, up until the sixth or seventh chigger, and then i said, “No more!” But they’re not very good listeners. So for some odd, unfathomable reason, the little mites seem to find no other feet on campus quite as suitable as mine for their slumber parties. I am not even kidding...so far my friends and I have pulled out about 20 chiggers, from under my toenails (the most painful kind), from my big toe to my smallest, and all my other buddies have had one or two since they’ve been here. I have provided my friends here with countless moments of entertainment, as they all seem to just wait anxiously to find “another one” in Anca’s foot to be extracted and dug out. I say enough is enough! But once again, the critters are not very good listeners.
One of our students has been having seizures in the night more and more frequently. The first time i awoke to the frightening cry of two girls that didn’t know what was happening and were crying for someone to come. Liz and I jumped out of our beds and went to see what was the matter, and saw there poor Noelia, having an epileptic attack. All we could do was make sure she was safe on her bed and wait until she came out of the spell. Honestly, my heart was beating very fast as the minutes seemed like hours, watching her shaking there on her bed, chewing with her mouth, and eyes shutting and opening as if controlled by another force other than her own. She finally did come out of it, but when we asked her some simple questions, she could not respond properly and just went back to sleep. The next day she felt extremely sore in her whole body, with a terrible headache and sore tongue from having bit it numerous times.
Sabbath night she had another seizure. Some say that these seizures are related to demon-possession. Even though I have never seen a demon-possessed person, watching Noelia in her “attacks” seemed very close to what I was imagining the experience would be like. As I’m finding out more about epilepsy and seizures, i can say that there might indeed be a correlation. Even looking at it from a spiritual perspective, when one is not being temperate in all things, it leaves a foothold for the devil to operate.
Tuesday, November 18
8:00 pm
I need a massage. Or at least a hug.
Other than that, I had a great day! From taking care of Ms. Erma, our new patient since last week, to watching the little yellow “magic schoolbus” Cessna take off with Stacy going to attend her grandmother’s funeral, to teaching class...it’s been another full day in the jungle.
Anyway, I was talking about chiggers and seizures. Oh yes. Dengue fever. Well, we don’t know exactly what it is yet, but it’s been spreading from one student to the next and it seems like each victim that gets “the fever” has worse symptoms than the person before. Well, at least it’s the perfect opportunity for the students to practice their hydrotherapy and massage!
Rusty nails. Sliced finger. I’ve been getting to dig into human flesh! So much fun! I’ll just leave it at that for now.
The razor grass hasn’t been fun, however. It’s all over this place. When you walk or ride through the trails, it’s inevitable that you come out just cut up sometimes, whether it’s your feet, or legs, or arms or hands...i’ve experienced it all, except that this time it was my face and ear. Ouch. The stuff is like razor-sharp little knives - kinda like paper cuts only bigger. I still remember my first time getting acquainted with my little fuzzy foe - i was riding in the tractor and as i like to pull on to leaves and stuff as we’re going by, i saw this nice bushy plant and stuck my hand out to feel. Wrong move. Goes to show that the most sharp and painful things in life can initially look very welcoming and fuzzy and nice - but watch out!
So one of these days Vilissa and I decided that we’re going to stay up and watch for the puma. Or jaguar. Or tiger, whatever it is, the people always refer to it with a different name. But whatever it is, it’s a big cat that leaves it’s paw prints all over campus every now and then. The other morning the Sissons were astonished to find its tracks circling their house! When Rondell and I headed for Mashabo last Thursday, we also saw its tracks - but it wasn’t just one - there were definitely three! Two of them seemed small, so we figure it must be the mommy with it’s cubs. Totally dangerous, and would be totally awesome to see it!
I could keep going on about all the exciting creatures and plants and diseases around here, but my bed is looking too inviting to resist its calling, so i wish you all a “pleasant good night” - the typical Guyanese evening greeting....and remember, that here in Guyana, not letting the “bedbugs bite” takes on a totally different meaning!
Thursday, November 20
4:00 pm
I now have my very own adopted Guyanese Daddy! I’m sooo happy!! :D
Just got back from Mashabo not too long ago...it was another great experience. This time we crossed the river, in a small canoe carrying six of us. We first stopped at Mrs. Eunice’s house. Last week the students figured out by her symptoms that she also suffers from seizures, so this time we came prepared to do a couple treatments, but she asked that we come back after a little while so she could finish cleaning up. So we promised our return, and headed for the trail once more.
We walked a ways through some more brush, mud, and a beautiful little creek filled with water lilies and hanging vines as we came upon the only concrete house in the village - of Sharifa and her husband’s, Fazel. This young couple was interested in the Bible study on marriage, so we ended up having a wonderful discussion on the topic. I didn’t realize until we came back to Mrs. Eunice’s afterword that Fazel is Muslim! And here he was, very interested in the Bible, asking many questions and even requesting we bring him a small Bible next time!
So back at Mrs. Eunice’s, Vilissa and Audrea gave the dear lady an enema and just as we were finishing, her husband came home from work, eager to talk to us and visit, so we that’s just what we did! We sat down and he began telling us all about his work, farming cassava and making cassrip, an interesting sauce; reminded me of molasses somewhat. He proceeded to tell us all about the process and how he’s thankful to God for his success in his business of selling the cassrip...come to find out, Mr. Kenneth, soon to become my adopted Papi, is also Muslim! And let me tell you, he’s the kindest, most generous and big-hearted man I’ve ever met in Guyana! After chatting a bit, he just pulls out some pencils and notebooks and gives them to us. Then he treats us to some fresh coconut water and just to make sure we’re satisfied, picks some oranges off his tree and gives us some as well!
After all of this, he takes me around his beautiful yard and since I’m now his adopted daughter, tells me, “Now you’re the boss. You need to know what takes place here.” So he’s showing me all these different types of tropical fruits, his papaya trees and prickly soursaps and promises next time I come to teach me how to cook all those exotic fruits - so much fun! Such nice people in Mashabo, but really, nobody treated us so well as did my Papi, hehe! I felt right at home...
And yet, home is still home, and honestly, i miss it a great deal. Asking the Lord for strength for each day and keeping busy has greatly helped the “missing moods” but they never truly completely go away. It’s not the easiest thing to be alone in a foreign land after all...
Sunday, November 23
9:00 pm
Sometimes I wonder if i’ll ever be a great missionary. Too many times i have to deal with my silly feelings of loneliness, overwhelmingness, and the realities of my weaknesses. Awe man, I think i just swallowed an insect again. During worship this evening some little nasty fly flew into my eye and it felt as if it bit my eyeball, it hurt so bad and even now my eye’s still hurting. But anyways...
So yes, sometimes i have these moments like i am having now that I just need to talk to somebody. I have nobody here, really, except for my Best Friend, and believe me, I have been talking to Him like no other time. The peacefulness of the jungle, the simple life without the major distractions of entertaining screens and other nonsenses, the dark night sky lit up with numberless bright stars, and so many other things about this place really draw you closer to the Lord, but yet sometimes i still feel a void in my heart, maybe not actually a void, because really my soul is filled, but just a desire, i should say, of companionship, of somebody to understand, someone to trust and to lean upon. I guess i am finding out how much I did rely on my friends and family, for encouragement, for advice, for hugs and laughs and support. I don’t get too much of that here, so it’s a little harder.
I am also figuring out that I am not as independent and self-confident as i once was - or thought i was. More often than not, i find myself wanting to be in the background, not so much the glamorous spotlight i once coveted. I wish for help to make all the many decisions i have to make each day and i wish that not so much would depend on the decision i do end up making. I am no more ashamed to ask for help! All these new things, these new feelings and experiences, maybe they’re part of growing up, i don’t know, but it’s all kinda new and strange to me. I feel like this mission field experience changes one like nothing else can. I am no longer the little girl i used to be and sometimes that thought makes me sad when i look at myself and have to say, “Who are you? Why are you so dull and boring now?” The totally free, careless spirit is being extinguished. In place of it there is a deeply focused and serious character that is almost new to me. Very weird, i know.
So why i choose to share all this with you, is not only for my own sake, to “spill” but to hopefully send the message out to keep pressing on. Galatians 6:9 has become a very real promise to me this past week. “And let us not be weary in well-doing, for in due time we shall reap, if we faint not.” I cannot faint. Not now. The Lord has sustained me thus far, He will continue to do so. Though i may not feel like going out, four days a week to Mashsabo, to walk the 10 miles back and forth, to sleep with the man-eating mosquitoes or deal with smelly outhouses and sleeping on the floor; though i may not feel like getting up early to face another full day of cooking for the campus or preparing the special meals for the patients and doing it all with a smile on my face, and then be misunderstood or not get any bit of affirmation or appreciation, though i may not feel like going through all of these things, who am i do get weary of well-doing? Who am i to allow my eyes to be taken off the mark and look solely upon my own pitiful state? I refuse to continue in this way.
Though the odds are against me, i WILL be a great missionary.
Sunday, December 14 - New York
7:30 pm
I am definitely the only person in this whole airport that’s wearing flip-flops. Probably the only one that has freezing cold feet as well.
So I’m back in the states. I am here among people of every nation, tongue, color and race. I am here, back to the land of the rat-race, where you are face-to-face with a hamster wheel chase. (hehe, I’m also a poet - did you know it??)
Tuesday, December 16 - Virginia
4:30 pm
Well I’m not going to lie, I barely got to start that last update, because I had to board the plane and afterwords I just fell asleep. But I’m home now!! It’s never felt so good. School went on break until the beginning of January and thanks to my parents, I got a ticket to come home for a couple of weeks. I will be returning in no time, however.
Coming back home has been great, I must admit. I’ve enjoyed every minute of the past 24 hours, minus the cold dreariness of this season, but even that brings a certain freshness to the air around. I experienced a lot of “firsts” since the past three and half months - my first hot shower, first time eating a big juicy apple, a pear, broccolli, and roasted pumpkin seeds, along with a ton of other goodies my sweet Mami has so graciously prepared...my first time actually making a phone call and talking on the phone for more than five minutes, my first time getting to a destination without going on a boat-ride, also my first time using a microwave to heat up food and a laundry machine to wash my clothes. Will it be hard to leave all these comforts again? Probably not, but we’ll see. The hardest part, I’m sure of though, won’t be leaving the comforts of things, but of people.
I guess I can honestly say that’s one of the hardest things about living in Guyana - missing the people I love so much and barely having any way of communication. As time went by though, I realized I was getting more used to it and just tried to get accustomed to being “alone” but I am looking forward with GREAT anticipation to seeing everyone. How happy I am to see the all-new, reduced gasoline prices!!
Since coming home, I’ve been asked almost a dozen times what the plan is after Guyana. So I thought I should include this lovely piece of information in this public e-mail update. (Though it’s public, I am totally open to a private, one-on-one counseling session from anyone of you, however, if you may have any advice, suggestions, questions or comments, hehe).
First of all, I must say that going to Guyana provided me with what I was looking for: to practically see for myself what the mission field really needs. From there, I will explain what have been some of my recent conclusions about what to do with my life after I finish my mission service. However, since plans are still underway, and also for lack of time now, I will have to finish this entry at another time.
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